i have to get out Jul 27, 2009

night means life to me; crickets, leaves
rustling a breeze, the sky just a shade
above the darkness behind the trees. Black you may say is death but

death is no spectre, no cloak or dagger
but an agent of change, money lost or gained -
when you misplace your wallet and find it,
death has been there that day. though

I find it hard to convince myself of this —

as a dreamer,screaming, tears itSelf from a nightmare
washedover wth early morning synlight
in a bask of familiar+ calm (i
know this place, amNotLost
as an animal adopted
yearns for the outside world
(the grassbetweentoes, blueskywhiteclouds,
                    god, the wind

some times, (esp. in my hands) i am trapped
--feeling the walls of humanity
(as fingers only extend so far,)
Suddenly so far is not far enough (limitations--
push against limitations---but only one dream
can be woken from at atime b4 u mst fallaslleepaggain...

everything is a cycle &
escaping is just a nOther

This was how I thought for a long time, and
then when it. rained. I lost my life in the night, became a seagull,
an angel, i was reborn and forgot everything
and here I thought God was above me but I
I have been brought level and I see
the angels climbing up and down the ladder

I am God, you are God, you just don't realize it yet,
and I still know nothing, and we are all dumb before this great machine of beauty
which is silent and deafening and God. I would love to stay. But all things must